Sparkle brought home this giant purple ball of dough recently, and it's...big, to say the least. And purple. But there's so many things that we can do with it! Like talk to it! Billy Bob decided to do that, though. I didn't feel like talking to a lump of dough. Even though it was purple, to say the least.
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| "Uh...hi, purple ball of...dough!" |
Sparkle decided to bury himself in it. Or at least make it into a good chair. Did we mention that the dough was really stretchy? Did we mention it was purple????
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| "Guys...my head won't fit! And I think I'm stuck!" |
Let's just say it took a large plunger to get Sparkle out of the dough. I'm not sure he was so generous with it after he had to get pulled out with something that we usually clean our toilets with. (Don't worry. We used a clean plunger. But the idea still scarred Sparkle.) Perky decided to give it a go, though, and stuck his head in it. Sparkle didn't mind standing on it. He just didn't want to stand in it.
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| "Hi! I'm Perky! And I'm a giant ball of purple dough!" |
Billy Bob, even though Sparkle warned him numerous times, wanted to stand in his own dough bowl. So we made him one. He didn't stick, much to Sparkle's disappointment. I think it's because Billy Bob's skinnier. And the fact that he has two feet, not four. Just don't tell Sparkle that I think Billy Bob's skinnier. The last time I did that, all of our waffles went missing, and there was a trail of syrup leading to Sparkle's door.
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| "I don't recall you saying that you were going to stand in the dough on. Your. Head!!!" -Sparkle |
Trust Billy Bob to make things more complicated when he can. When he does that, things get a lot more complicated for the rest of us. He ended up breathing in some dough, choking on it, leaving me to do the Heimlich maneuver while Sparkle could only look on, torn in between horror and laughter. I'm sure he was thinking something along the lines of Billy Bob getting served. Although I'm not sure Sparkle knows what that means...We decided to see, as a large chunk of dough, if it would float. I'd read somewhere that dough usually floats. I mean, how else did they have that giant floating piece of bread in "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs"?
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| "Are you guys totally sure about this?" -Billy Bob |
Long story short: that dough boat doesn't float. I'm sure Billy Bob could tell you the same thing, only he'd add details about how his nose got soaked and Sparkle was screaming in his ear the entire time about how the boat was going to sink. To take his mind off of things, we decided that we'd play basketball with the lump of dough. Originally all three of us had been on the edge, but thanks to the dough, I had been the only one left.
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| "Ya know, the bottom of this can smells pretty good..." -Sparkle |
Getting the two of them out of the can was another story. There were a lot of poles involved, some duct tape, and Sparkle's dreaded fear of the plunger. We used it on Billy Bob this time, though, because we knew that Sparkle would freak out. To appease the both of them, I allowed them to go bowling with the dough. Unfortunately, that didn't go so well, as the doughball ended up rolling off of the lane and onto the carpet.
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| "That's gutter ball...number three..." -Billy Bob |
Before I knew it, Sparkle and Billy Bob had swept up the ball and had climbed up onto the TV, waiting to drop it. Why would they even do that? I know Sparkle's still smarting over the whole plunger thing, but did he really need to put the dough ball in danger? I'd come to love the thing! I could only stare up at them and hope that they didn't reduce the dough ball to a flat pancake...
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"Is this really necessary?" -me
"Completely!!!" -Sparkle |
Well, the dough ball is now a dough pancake...with a lot of carpet fluff on it. Billy Bob says it'll be okay though. "A little soap and water, and it'll be good as new!" he told me. But it didn't have the same smiley face it did before. It was still purple. It just didn't smile....Note to self: surround Sparkle with plungers while he's sleeping....
